One Size Does NOT Fit All!

How many times have we seen “One size fits all!” on clothing? As a plus sized woman I can tell you…that is NOT true! Too many times I have tried to fit into their one size fits all clothing and almost every time I was sadly disappointed. How I wish it were true, but it’s not!

And yet, no, I don’t. Yes, it would be nice to fit in those super cute clothes, but that is where it stops for me. I am so glad that God has made each of us unique. We are not one size fits all and I celebrate that!

Have any of you seen someone on Facebook or even just in conversation say “if you don’t agree with me on this topic then just unfriend me now!”? Why does one size have to fit all in our thinking, in our opinions, in our views? The truth is, it doesn’t. One size does not fit all. I believe we can actually go deeper if we allow others to challenge our thoughts, our beliefs, our words. To me it is a sign of fear that I’m wrong if I won’t even consider something else. Now, I’m not talking about your deep convictions. If you have thought things through and have a biblical basis to stand in that place, then take your stand and stay there. But don’t be afraid to let someone else say what they think. If you both politely put your views out there to be thoughtfully considered not as an argument to prove who is right, you might actually see some things change - in yourself and in others.

Another place I have come up against that one size fits all mentality is in friendships. I remember many years ago when I was a freshman in high school. We had recently moved to a small town where most of the kids had been together for all their school years, and I was just trying to figure out where I fit in all of that. I traveled on the activity bus to a basketball tournament. Some of us were walking downtown in this other small town to eat lunch. I was walking with two girls I hadn’t spent much time with yet. One of them looked at me and said that if I was going to be their friend, I had to not hang out with this other girl who had reached out in friendship to me. Even though I had seen these two girls as potential friends, that was it for me. If you are going to dictate to me who I am to be, who I can hang with, then bye bye!

I wish I could say that I held to that conviction all my life. Too many times in my life I have tried to mold my behavior, my appearance, my ideas in order to gain the approval or friendship of someone I have wanted to be like or thought I needed to like me. You need to wear these clothes, this makeup, this hairstyle, do these activities with me and with me exclusively in order to be my friend. Why did it take me so long to see that it was the same thing as had happened in high school? Why did it take me so long to realize that God made me uniquely me and I do not have to conform to what any person says or does in order to be loved and accepted? I desire to conform to His love and His ways only. That is when my uniqueness will shine - in Him and for Him.

Recently I reconnected with a precious friend from my college years. We share a love for God, and both want to love and serve Him. The first time we got together after many years, that total love and acceptance in Him that we had shared so many years ago connected us once again. It has been so nourishing! Are we exactly the same, no. But we value who the other is on the inside and our friendship is growing even more.

I have another friend that has come in and out of my life since Kindergarten. When we get together by phone or in person it is always so good. Again, are we totally the same - no. While there may be some traits that I admire in each of them I know that neither of them requires me to act a certain way in order to be their friend. One size does not fit all. I have experienced that great friendship and acceptance from my husband, who is my best friend, but it seemed to elude me in friendships with women.

Think about a jigsaw puzzle. If all the puzzle pieces were exactly the same, then, yes, they would all fit with all the other pieces, but would not interlock. And the overall picture would be a mess! Each puzzle piece is unique and fits in a unique place in this beautiful tapestry God has made called life! Yes, God can reshape our pieces and cause us to fit in a different spot in different times of our life. My husband and I are currently finding that out as God moved us halfway across the country into a small community that we had never lived in before. But thankfully, one size does not fit all. It’s causing me to stretch and grow and I am so thankful for that.

So, when you have some person or some circumstance that is demanding that you do, be, or act a certain way, take a step back and think about it. Does one size fit all? Is God stretching me in this area? What does His Word say about my situation? Don’t refuse to ever change, just refuse to conform to someone’s standards and ideals in order to be accepted as a friend or be loved as a person. Stand in your uniqueness! God gave you your uniqueness and He loves you so much! One size does NOT fit all!